When did this happen?

Parents before us have said that from the time they're born, we are constantly learning to let go. As a result,our role as parents to our children, also has to change.

As our child grows, develops, learns, and matures, so does our parenting role.

This can be very daunting, especially if your child has special needs. Just as you start to relax and think you have everything under control things may change...and you have to readjust your role in your child's life, their schedule or routine.

As your child has grown, you undoubtedly have discovered they have their own unique personality and temperament.

You've probably unconsciously redeveloped your parenting skills around the individual special needs of your child.

And no two children are exactly alike, and therefore, neither should your parenting style be.

This is especially true for parents who may have a child with special needs and other children that don't. Your special needs child may need more guidance and feel unsure of themselves, so we've become used to having to guide, lead, show and encourage that child consistently through their childhood while still trying to encourage independence and give praise in order to build their self esteem and confidence level. Yet your other child child may be very motivated and very wilful and not need a great deal of guidance or leadership from you. While you encourage their independence, it's also important that you also encourage their ability to ask for help when needed and continue to praise good deeds, actions, and traits.

The most important tools we have in order to successfully adjust our parenting skills are our eyes and our ears. We have to see what's going on with our child and we have to hear what they are telling us. It's important that we encourage our child to be their own individual while still being available to them at whatever level or degree they need us to be.

Sometimes it's situation-specific as well. A child may not need us to be as directly involved with their schooling to ensure their overall academic success, but they may need us to be more involved in their social life as they may be feeling a bit shaky or scared when it comes to making new friends or meeting new people.

So the bottom line is this: as your child grows and changes, so should your parenting skills.

Keep your eyes and ears open and communicate honestly and openly with your child, and you'll both mature gracefully,happily and with heaps of self-esteem!

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